diary I ~
no one
can tell
where my
pain rises
let me feel
only you incline
your heart to mine
broken as yours is
let me have you
soundless awakening
breathless, pushing
into needs
wait for
the desire
sharp & uncomprising
that tells
on me
tells on you
have me
Cynthia
{.09}
16 comments:
The structure is stunning! The entire piece is intensified by this amazing structure. Well done!!! The words are brilliant as always!
Hey BrosR. how are you? Thank you!
I'm attempting to shake things up
a bit.
Wonderful....yes you have shaken things up! Love it
Linda
Hi Cynthia,
Very intense lines; I can imagine them written in flaming letter. There is a strong sense of presence in this poem: "sharp & uncomprising". Really powerful and skillfully composed.
power-packed words. good writing!!!
Hi LInda, Thank you so much!
Hello Jenny, Oh I like that a
flaming letter. Thank you!
Hi Shadow, thanks so much! BTW,
love your foodie blog.
Oy! Positively provocative. What an impact these bullet-like lines carry.
-vey LoL. Thank you Janice, the
short lines are a tad challenging
for me, yet I managed to abide by a 2 - 5 syllable [count]lines.
This is both evocative and provocative..a bold one, Cynthia :)
wishes,
devika
Hi Devika, thank you and thanks for
visiting & commenting! Hope you
are feeling well.
I am loving this, you. I am loving that not so many words convey so much feeling to me.
Hi Sarah, Thank you! Your words
are gratifying for me, to know
this poem struck a chord with you.
Hi Cynthis..
I am in love with you .. may be not with you but certainly with your words. Such inetnsity, such beauty. I am floored.
I must confess it is a love at first visit.
Hello Dani, what a wonderful compliment! I hope you will continue to read my poetry.
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